بورة مجيّهة ولا عرس مجهجه

واحدة من أكتر الحاجات المكرّهاني حياتي الأيام دي هي فرق العمر المتزايد بيني وبين البنيّات المعرّسات (حديثا أو قديما) البيتمنوا لي من كلللل قلبهم إنو العيد الجاي أكون “في بيتي”؛ وطبعا أنا الأكبر بكتير. كلّو ما أشوف نظرة الشفقة على وشوشهم لمن يعاينوا لي يديني الخالية من الدبلة ورجليني الخالية من الحنة غيظي بيتضاعف. والغايظني أكتر من كده إنو أنا لمن كنت في عمرهم كنت بحس بنفس الشفقة تجاه البنات/النسوان الما متزوجات الفي عمري حسة. ما بيهمّش كمية الإمتحانات النجحت فيها، راتبي الباخده كم، نوع العربية السايقاها أو سعر الشنطة الشايلاها والجزمة اللابساها؛ لحدي اليوم اليجي فيهو راجل طاير يعرسني حأعتبر دائما وأبدا غير محظوظة وغيرموفقة في حياتي. أهلي المساكين حيُعتَبروا مبتَلين بوجودي أنا وأخواتي المغير متزوجات في بيتهم للأبد. أنا البايركس التعيسة.
حسة بعمري ده حأٌعتبر محظوظة لو في أي راجل مهما كانت خلقته إتبرع يجي يشيل حملي من أبوي. ويستر الله كان بقيت مرة وأبيته، أو حتى فكرته ساااكت أرفض هذا العرض الكريم، بغض النظر عن نوعه! هو أنا لاقية؟ في العمر والزمن ده؟ كييييف بس؟ منو البيهمو شغله شنو أو شغال أصلا ولا لأ، قاري ولا لأ، بيسجر ولا بيشرب ولا لو في يوم من حياته سجد سجدة واحدة لربنا؟ منو البيهمو جاي من ياتو بيئة؟ مافي زول بيهمو، فأنا زاتي مفروض ما يهمني، المهم راجل وخلاص. هو زاتو كتّر خيرو الجا، تجيه الكِشّة يا يمممة. وكمان كان بقى من الأهل الله معاي. عندها سيكون غضب السماء أضعافا وأضعاااااف لو حاولت أتخارج من الموضوع بأي إجابة غير الموافقة. ويقوموا يجوا الناس البيقولوا ليك ياخ مااا مهم، ما مهم لو انت ما طايقة وشو ده، ما مهم لو ما عندكم أي حاجة مشتركة، ما مهم “لأنه الحاجات دي كلها بتتغير بعد العرس وده كلو ما حيكون مهم بعدين”. وطبعا الجماعة ديل بيكونوا جكسوا بعض ستمية سنة كدة واختاروا أزواجهم على أكتر من مهلهم، وما عندهم أدنى فكرة عن موضوع “عرس الغفلة” ده. بس المهم تعرسي! تعرسي منو دي حاجة ثانوية. أصصصلا ما مهم انو الحتعرسيهو دا حتكوني بتطبخي ليهو للأبد، تنومي وتصحي بيهو في وشك للأبد، وما عندك أي طريقة مخارجة منو إلا تشردي من البيت أو تموتي، لأنه حيكون قاااااعد صباح ضهر مساء، يقول ليك تعملي ويحميك تعملي وقلتي لي وما سوّيتي. وكمان لو بقى نوع الرجال السودانييييين داك، ما حيرفع أصبع يساعدك وانت ميتينك طالع في النضافة والتربية والأكل والشيل، وكمان تكوني شغالة دا كلو وفي نفس الوقت محاولة بقدرة قادر تقري قرايتك وتشتغلي شغلك وتكوّني نفسك، ودا كلو لزول انت أصلا كارهاهو كره العمى! ودي واحدة من الأسباب البتخلي الناس يتطلقوا من بدري، أو ينتحروا.
المجتمع السوداني حياته كللللها بتدور حوالين موضوع واحد بس: العرس. العرس للجميع ورغم أنف الجميع! العرس هو الحل لكل المشاكل! العرس هو العلاج الفعال لأي مرض عضال! كل يوم ماشي وجاي للدكتور؟ عرسوا ليهو طوالي. مدبرسة وتعبانة وما طايقة روحها؟ بس تعرس، والله تبقى مييية مية. مجنون؟ عنده انفصام في الشخصية؟ قتال قتلاء؟ بس العرس! كللللو يتصلح بعد داك! طبعا للرجال الموضوع زيادة خير: تخلّص قرايتك، تشتغل ليك شغلانية ظريفة كدا ويا حبذا لو اغتربت في الخليج ولا أمريكا، تبني ليك بيت ولا شقة ولا انشاءالله اوضة ساكت وبعد داك تشوف ليك مرة مناسبة (بيضاء وعيونها كبار وشعرها طويل، يا حبذا نكون بت ناس فلان الفلاني)، وبعد داك تمشي الحج وتموت طوالي بارتياح. أما البنات: كان طرتن كان قعدتن، تبقي وزيرة ولا مديرة ولا انشاءالله رئيسة الجمهورية زاتها، كان ما بقيتي مرة راجل عمرك ما حتكوني حاجة! مهما تنجزي في حياتك، والله الشهادات دي كلها ما توديكي حتة ولا تعمل ليكي حاجة. لكن تقعدي في بيتك لا قراية لا شغل وتعرسي أي واحد وخلاص، والله تسوي عشرين بت. يعني شنو يعني كان بيدقك ولا يشتمك؟ يعني شنو يعني كان أمه وأخواته زي العقارب يقرصوا في لحمك ليل نهار؟ بس العرس العرس العرس! يعرّس ركبيكم انشاءالله. بري يختي! بورة مجيييييهة ولا عرس مجهجه! أففف!

2 thoughts on “بورة مجيّهة ولا عرس مجهجه”

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الذين هم على صلاتهم دائمون

A few days ago I went out with my sister and friends for eftar at this place in Riyad. After we broke our fast we took turns to pray on this mat on the abandoned top floor of the restaurant. I waited for a couple of guys to finish, then took my sandals off and stepped onto the mat. Then a young girl appeared and asked me where the bathroom was for wudu (ablutions). I recognized her as one of a couple sitting at the table next to ours, and taking in her heavy makeup, perfume and shiny hair, I wondered at her bravery for wanting to wash her face. Usually, if you’re going out and know you’ll have to pray at some point, it makes sense to go prepared. And there’s no point of going out for eftar without praying maghrib. Anyway, the bathroom on that floor was dark and didn’t look like it worked, so I told her there should be one on the floor below us, at which point she disappeared. I forgot all about her and took my time and finished my prayers, then went back downstairs again, only to find the girl back in her seat, makeup and hair in place. She was right in front of me and jumped guiltily when she saw me, and looked down at her plate in embarrassment. I ignored her and went to my table and sat down, laughing to myself at this girl’s ignorance of who it was she should be embarrassed of. Obviously not me, cuz I couldn’t care less who she was and whether she prayed or fasted or even bathed or not.
However, I wondered about the fact that there are still people these days who don’t pray. I mean, I know a lot of kids don’t, but I don’t really understand why. And it’s so lame and primitive, not praying, like, inta lisa min zaman alnas ma bisalo? I mean, really, why don’t they pray? Is it because they don’t believe in God? How is that even possible? I always wondered about people who don’t believe God exists. Especially people who are in a field even remotely related to science, and especially medicine. I mean, how could you see how intricately every tiny being in this humongous universe is built and designed and functioned, and believe that all that was created by some freak accident? How could you study about gas exchange in the lungs and neurotransmitters in the brain and how the scents that you smell trigger memories that are in themselves electricity and chemicals stirred together, and how a child is conceived and put together cell by cell to form a heart and a brain and a spine, then a whole human being, and delivered to the world to walk and talk and poop, and believe that there could be no One behind that? How could you know that 80% of all beings are water, but you still end up having cucumbers and tomatoes and caterpillars and sunflowers, all grown from the same water pouring down from the sky and sprout from the same dirt in the ground, but all so different, and believe this is all just coincidence? How can you not believe in God after everything you see around you day in day out? If you don’t then there’s just something wrong with you.
Or don’t you pray because you believe in God, but don’t think you need to do anything about that belief? I’ve met and heard of dozens of people who explain that their belief in God and their worship for him is purely spiritual, and that they don’t need to actually do anything about that belief, and it’s between them and God. Its people like these that truly test my faith sometimes, because they explain with utmost ease and certainty and confidence that faith and worship should be simple spiritual, and that God doesn’t need us to go through routine bowing and bending motions to prove anything. One person actually went so far as to tell me that actually, the whole Islamic nation has had it wrong for years, that there’s really no such thing as praying and fasting and such, and that somewhere along the way all this was a misinterpretation of what God and the Prophet (SAWS) actually said. Really? I mean, really?? These people can go on for hours and its actually a waste of time bring their attention to things like the 5 pillars of Islam, and convincing that, actually, without ALL FIVE of these pillars, there’s kind of no point of your Islam at all. And one of those pillars is praying 5 times a day ON TIME. Newsflash ya 7abba:
قال رسول الله (صلى الله عليه وسلم) “أول ما يحاسب عليه العبد يوم القيامة الصلاة فإن صلحت صلح سائر عمله وإن فسدت فسد سائر عمله” رواه الترمذي والنسائي
Bala spirituality ma3ak bala bi6eekh 3alek Allah.
 
I guess most kids don’t pray simply because they’re too lazy to, or don’t realize how dangerous not praying is, or because it’s just not cool cuz none of their idols with their pants down to their knees do it. But who ever said that not praying or wearing hijab or reading quran and seera lessens any bit of what cool you have? You don’t have to grow a beard and wear short pants you know, you can still rock your Converse and even those ridiculous pants and headgear but still step into a mosque when it’s time to pray. And hijab is way more cooler than it used to be, it’s not about walking around in a shapeless sack anymore. There are loads of cool young Muslims who are like a breath of fresh air, like Ahmed Alshigeiri, Mustafa Davis and Leila Aboulela. Just look at regular people like you and me: bloggers, writers, photographers, film makers, graphic designers, fashion designers, etc. I used to think it’s the family’s fault for not raising them right, and many times it is. But kids reach their teenage years and start doing things their own way no matter how right their parents teach them, so we can’t always blame them. The biggest problem is who they make friends with at this point, cuz they’re the ones who’ll drag them down or pull them up. And how someone could hear just one aya describing Hell and all its horrors, or 3athab alqabr with its crushing darkness and terror, and still have the nerve to simply ignore such a huge and yet easy thing like praying, is just beyond me.
To be honest, I think Muslims who ‘believe’ in God but don’t pray for whatever reason or excuse, are shallow and ignorant, for want of a better word. It’s not about the praying routine itself, it’s about doing what you’re told and trying your best to make yourself a better person with the ultimate goal of rida Alla SWT. Yes, you give to the poor and you don’t lie. But why? Just because? Or because that’s the ‘right’ thing to do? Doing good things for the sake of God gives your work a third dimension, makes it more meaningful, because you’re doing this out of faith, knowing that you’ll get more blessings than you can imagine just for intending to do good. Or when you work really hard in your job or studies, because part of being a good Muslim is to seek education and put as much effort as possible into whatever it is you do.
Anyway, I’m probably not doing the best job of encouraging people to pray and wear hijab and stuff. What I want to say is that people who don’t pray are lame. Bas. Shape up, people, this isn’t a joke. And its never too late to start, but it’s also never too early. God is really nice, but His wrath is also something you don’t even want to know about.
 
 
فَقُلْتُ اسْتَغْفِرُوا رَبَّكُمْ إِنَّهُ كَانَ غَفَّارًا (10) يُرْسِلِ السَّمَاء عَلَيْكُم مِّدْرَارًا (11) وَيُمْدِدْكُمْ بِأَمْوَالٍ وَبَنِينَ وَيَجْعَل لَّكُمْ جَنَّاتٍ وَيَجْعَل لَّكُمْ أَنْهَارًا (12) سورة نوح 
 

3 thoughts on “الذين هم على صلاتهم دائمون”

  1. I know a LOT of people who don't really pray – wherever you go with Muslims, you'll find this. I think it's mainly because they just have 'cultural Islam' – they believe kinda sorta, but can't be bothered actually doing stuff.

  2. I'm sure this will inspire so many people to pray and try to be better Muslims 🙂
    Mashallah

  3. I liked the Laila Abulela reference!
    I blame it on how people raised their kids,see how Islam is more of a community thing?

    How do you think has a stronger faith?
    a.one who prays on time but sins regularly
    b.a guy who does not pray but does not harm anyone or do any sins?

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يمهل ولا يهمل


Now that is one LONG road to walk
I worry about this government, because its members are now showing signs of insanity. They’ve always been stupid, greedy, homicidal, but insanity is something new. Several events have led to this assumption, not least of which was the latest instalment in the hospital-selling series, and the new bus stop in Sharwani. Also, today I listened to some horrific statistics about migration of doctors and nurses (almost 10,000 in 2012 alone!), and the equally horrific response of senior officials: so what?
Ombada Hospital is a relatively new hospital of fair size and capacity, and located on (what used to be) the outskirts of the capital. I remember when we used to go there for our OBGYN clinical round back in medical school we would drive for ages through neighbourhoods made out of cardboard until we passed Soug Libya and meet the beginning of the Shiryan Alshamal road we take to Karima, then the hospital would appear on our left. At the time there wasn’t a dialysis center; the center was built in 2010. This was the same center my late aunt Allah yer7ama had her sessions. I met the director of the center yesterday and again today during the forum I organized for the institute (which was a nightmare, but that’s a whole different post), and she told me that the center was being torn down. Torn down? I remembered my aunt saying the hospital had fallen to pieces and so was the center, was it old or just not built properly? It wasn’t old at all, it was being torn down because the hospital had been sold. To, as usual, a Saudi investor. Aji yakhwani?! They sold Ombada Hospital to a foreign investor, who was tearing it down because he wanted to build his own 5-star private hospital? In OMBADA? The whole point of building that hospital was because the people of that area can’t even afford the bus ride into town for medical care. That hospital was the first in a very large area of nothing, with an insanely high population density most of whom have moved in from the states and taken up shanty housing. And having a dialysis center is for the same reason: geographical distribution of patients. I shudder to think how much sooner my aunt would have died if she had had to go to the second nearest dialysis center in the military hospital twice a week (instead of 3 times because 3 times is a luxury despite being a necessity), when she couldn’t even lift herself out of bed. Apparently, the foreign investor was not interested in keeping any of the original parts of the hospital – including the dialysis center. So they simply unplugged the machines and patients and moved them to other parts of Omdurman: to the children’s hospital, and one machine which is Hep C +ve to Alnow hospital. Just like that. And in the past week, FIVE PATIENTS died because they were old and couldn’t make it to the new centers and didn’t get their sessions. Just like that.
Building a renal dialysis center is no joke. You need water connections and purifying stations, constant source of electricity, and lots of space. Machines are very expensive and the disposable material almost just as much. The proportion of the population with end stage renal disease is soaring, and getting a regular place on a machine in any center is almost impossible. Patients stay in line sometimes waiting for another patient to die to be able to take their place. It’s a nightmare. I thank God a million times that my own grandfather hasn’t needed anymore dialysis sessions otherwise we would’ve been part of this nightmare as well, and it’s bad enough as it is.
The other sign of insanity is the new bus stop where half the buses were moved to from their original place in Alhurria just before the bridge. That wasn’t even where they were to start with; they used to be in Alsoug Alarabi where I used to go to when I was in college. When I lived in Bahri I would ride to Abo Jinzeer, and from there walk literally all the way across Alsoug Alarabi to get to the minibuses that would take me to Elmogran, and then walk from there to college. The whole thing took about an hour, but going back home was a different story. If I didn’t manage to get there and get on a bus before 3 pm, I could forget about getting home before dark. When we moved to Khartoum it was more or less the same journey: from my house to the same place, but then a shorter walk to the Omdurman station where I would get on another set of minibuses and get off just a 2 minute walk from college. It wasn’t that bad, really, and even though it involved long walking distances it was still in one place and no walk would take more than 5 minutes. Then they decided to clean up the area because they wanted to build that fancy mall and other such places, and the buses were moved to probably the worst place they could be in, next to Alhurria which is already a nightmare of a road, and one that doesn’t have the capacity to hold 10 carros, let alone hundreds of buses.
But this is something new. Now people have to walk about 20 or 25 minutes in this baking heat to get to their other bus, going to or coming from Omdurman. Because the wali woke up one morning and said: let’s move the bus stop! And that’s just what happened. In one day they pushed Omdurman from one side of a very long road to the other side. Just like that. I don’t wonder what he/they were thinking, because we know that thinking requires a brain which is something we know for a fact does not exist in certain people of certain political affiliation. What I do wonder about is how do these people come up with these ideas? No, seriously, who would think of moving an entire bus stop and throw it 5km away from the rest of the transport system? I mean, it’s bad enough people have to take public transport anyway, which already involves loads of walking in all sorts of weather. And what problem is this supposed to solve, if that was the whole point?
This is getting serious. I think we need a doctor and quick, because God knows what would come next. We’ve already heard of things as ridiculous as market entry fees. The hospital selling spree is hitting crazy heights, and Khartoum Hospital is already getting torn down. I went to the medical commission today to get a yellow fever vaccination, and was surprised that you have to pay 101 pounds just for the card. Every time I think I’ve seen all the ways the government makes money from the people, and just how much, I’m surprised by something new like this. Every time I think we’ve seen the extent of the torture the government has made the mission of their lives to inflict on the people, we find that actually, there’s more to come. We might wake up one day to find they’ve decided to take down all the bridges because the metal interferes with their state of the art defence machines. Or that anyone with a white car is to be fined for having the same coloured car as the president. Or whatever!
By the way, did you hear the news? Army personnel will now be getting a 22% increase in their salaries. Just like that. Wal ma 3ajbo, ye7lig 7awajbo.
اتق دعوة المظلوم فليس بينه و بين الله حجاب

6 thoughts on “يمهل ولا يهمل”

  1. My eyes read your post and my heart recites
    قَوْله تَعَالَى : فَلَوْلَا إِذْ جَاءَهُمْ بَأْسُنَا تَضَرَّعُوا وَلَكِنْ قَسَتْ قُلُوبهمْ وَزَيَّنَ لَهُمْ الشَّيْطَان مَا كَانُوا يَعْمَلُونَ * فَلَمَّا نَسُوا مَا ذُكِّرُوا بِهِ فَتَحْنَا عَلَيْهِمْ أَبْوَاب كُلِّ شَيْء حَتَّى إِذَا فَرِحُوا بِمَا أُوتُوا أَخَذْنَاهُمْ بَغْتَة فَإِذَا هُمْ مُبْلِسُونَ

    I wonder if they see that far!!!

  2. I don't know if I've commented before – but I love, love, love your blog. The VERY first true Sudanese voice I've found on the Internet! Thanks for being awesome!

  3. اللهم لا تصلط علينا بذنوبنا من لا يخافك و لا يرحمنا. رب ما قدرناك حق قدرك و لكنك عفو تحب العفو فأعفو عنا.
    Dr. Reem. So pleased to have found your blog. It's Sayed (your Barloom). Congrats for your voice of honesty and reason. Keep up, hopefully we'll wake up of this nightmare someday.

  4. I have must've read through 12 articles of yours just today, and they are pleasant, truthful and extremely well written. However it comes back to the same question,what do we need to fix sudan? A reset button? How drastic of a change is needed to make this country a place where next generations can call home. Brain drain is at an all time high, so is inflation we are heading into what's mostly unknown and the only know part is we are heading in the wrong direction. Its time we take this country's fate into our own hands, what other choice do we have?

    Your Newest and Biggest Fan,

    Mak

  5. Hi Mak
    Thank you for the compliments! I'm happy you enjoyed my posts, my fan base is at an all-time low these days hahah. So its nice to know that someone's still reading. You asked the million dollar question my friend: what do we need to do? A reset button sounds just about right, but alas is not an option. I wish I had an answer, but all I can say and do is to just keep going, doing what little we can and keep hoping and believing that things will change for the better. They always do, in sha' Allah.

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هادم الملذّات

Death is a strange thing. It happens to everyone, and yet not to everyone. It takes so many guises and travels through so many media, and yet, the end result is the same. It is so final. And yet, it is just the beginning. We hear about it all the time, every day, from friends, on the news, in history books, in the Quraan. And yet! When it does eventually come, it’s always unexpected! You plan as fast and as hard as you can, but it’s always one step ahead. You think you know when it is coming for you, but in the end it always takes you by surprise.

I thought I was going to die once. As in, I was sure this was it. In August of 2009, 3 days before my birthday, I came down with the flu. It would have been no big deal, except that it was the swine flu at the height of the H1N1 global epidemic. And to make matters worse, I was the first confirmed doctor casualty to get infected from a patient despite full contact precautions. I remember every small detail that happened before the fever started. I remember that Salim Almazroui had had a massive stroke and was lying in the ICU, with dozens of his relatives and friends coming to visit every day, myself one of them. I remember seeing and talking to people I hadn’t met in years. And that Farida was one of the medical residents on call that week. And I remember the 2 boys who had arrived from Iran the night before, who had sky high fever and were coughing so much that when I entered the room I could actually see all the droplets in the air. The interesting part is that my shift was about the end 5 minutes later, but I preferred to see and swab them because otherwise they would wait for another half hour until the new shift had received and reviewed all their patients before getting to them.

Long story short, I caught the virus. The mask I was wearing was already moist from use, and was penetrable. And I wasn’t wearing goggles. I saw the boys on Monday night; the cough started on Friday, and Sunday morning I woke up at 6 am with my heart racing and my skin feeling like it was on fire. Not being used to having a fever, I didn’t know what was wrong with me until I checked my pulse and found it in the range of 120-125. When I measured my temperature later in the ER (to ask for the first and only sick leave in the history of my career) it was only 38.6, but it felt like 40. It stayed with me until Tuesday, during which I couldn’t sleep, and what little sleep I did get was fitful and interrupted by hallucinations and nightmares. I couldn’t eat anything solid, and what little I got in passed out almost immediately. On day 2 I started to bleed from the nose, and was nauseous all the time. The cough was the most irritating thing. And the fact that I knew I was going to die.

I don’t know what goes through people’s heads when this fact occurs to them. To me, as I lay sweating on the couch too weak to answer the phone that was ringing nonstop, I thought about what to do about this realization. I didn’t mind dying, that much I knew. But I was worried. Because whichever way I looked at it, I knew that if I died I would go to Hell. There was nothing that I had done in my life that would even give hope that I might end up in Heaven. Yes I wore hijab, I prayed and fasted and I tried to be a good person in general. But that was it. I had done nothing in my life to deserve mercy from The Most Merciful, and to escape those flesh-eating flames for all eternity. I tried to write a will, but didn’t have anything to give away. The only thing I could remember was the 35 pounds I owed Esam from Mix Max 7 years ago and which to this day I cannot for the life of me remember if I had paid back or not. When I had thought about it long enough, I tried to prepare myself for death by washing my hair and cleaning up, but just standing in the shower for 5 minutes was exhausting and I couldn’t even do that. In the end, I succumbed to my fate, and just prayed that my illness wipe away all my sins, and that my useless and shameful existence in this mortal world be forgiven and accepted. I didn’t think much about what it would actually feel like; I just knew that it was coming. And I vowed that, if I lived through this experience, I would be a better person.

Well, obviously I didn’t die, and felt like I had been given a second chance, which I shamefully admit I am not making much use of. I did contact a couple of people whom I felt I had wronged and apologized to them, and I went to Hajj. I am genuinely trying to improve many other things. However, man has a bad habit: no matter how close you get to death, you eventually forget about it. I do wonder, though if when it happens, would I go out with a bang, like Wardi, Imam Ali El-Sheikh and Princess Diana? Or would I just fade away out of existence and memory, like those figures on the list of a terrorist attack, or a lizard in the middle the desert? I don’t want to pass through this life, mortal and useless as it is, as a nobody, touching no one’s life, improving no one’s existence, changing nothing in the world, and leaving behind no good memory or legacy.

It’s never too late. Tomorrow, the rest of my life begins.

اللهم اهدينا في من هديت، و عافنا في من عافيت، و تولنا في من توليت، و بارك لنا في ما أعطيت، و اكفنا شر ما قضيت، انك تقضي و لا يقضى عليك، اللهم ارحم موتانا و ارحمنا اذا صرنا الى ما صاروا اليه، اللهم اجعل خير أعمالنا خواتمها و خير أيامنا يوم نلقاك يا كريم يا غفور يا أرحم الراحمين، امين

3 thoughts on “هادم الملذّات”

  1. This write-up is really touching and beautiful. Truly we forget easily. When you come to Qatar please let me know. You"ll make an inspirational writer someday insha Allah.

    Tawa

  2. اللهم ارحمنا وارحم موتانا
    عجيبة الدنيا دي..ربنا يرزقنا حسن الخاتمة

  3. .اللهم احيني ما دامت الحياة خير لي و توافاني ما دام في الموت خير لي

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